Every Couple has a Love Story

This year, I am fortunate to be on faculty at the Celebrant Foundation & Institute.This is the wonderful organization which trains individuals, in America and elsewhere, to perform weddings and other celebrations. This week’s class module was about the vital role of story telling in the lives of individuals and communities.

As I prepared for class, I was struck by something odd. I was struck by the fact that there is a noticeable disconnect. This disconnect is between our natural tendency to tell personal stories and the inclusion of these narratives in typical wedding ceremonies. However, it also made me think more about our personal story.

Your Personal Story and Wedding Ceremonies

As a result, I believe that most people have a great desire to have their voices “heard.” The goal, I imagine, is enhanced self-awareness and a greater connection with loved ones. These seemingly ethereal goals can be met in simple ways. Updates on Facebook, Twitter, or postings in the blogosphere. Sharing about wedding plans is no different. As a result, many brides and grooms create websites and blogs to chronicle impending nuptials. This facilitates virtual conversations with family and friends and heightening anticipation for the special day.

The wonderful writer Christina Baldwin adds more to this topic. She states that storytelling not only serves the individual but it functions as a connector to a broader community and shared history. Like that need to be heard. Men and women hold a similar drive to know “where they come from.” As a result, there is the enthusiastic pursuit of genealogical projects and the popularity of newly-developed personal DNA tests. This is literally mapping our history. They are but two tools that people use to link with original homelands and past generations.

Finding our Storytelling Passion

My underlying question in this rambling essay is this. In standard wedding ceremonies, where do we find this passion for storytelling? Above all, I would argue that, to a large degree, it is simply not there! What a shame that the couple’s story is not highlighted during this profound rite of passage.

Celebrants know that offering such a narrative is the heart and soul of a day’s events. As a result, our unique essays are written around simple, but wonderful, questions.

“How did you meet?”
“Tell me about your first date?”
“How does your partner show that he/she loves you?”
“When did you know this partnership was forever?”
“What are your dreams for the future?”

As a result, the couple’s journey is reflected with all of the gravity and levity that it deserves. All while recognizing their personalities and sensibilities.

Because of this, the narrative also offers the occasion to honor family members and ethnic ties. Therefore, the storytelling, in my experience, establishes an obvious intimacy between and among the couple and guests. Whether the guest list is 20 or 200. So, as a result, when you think about your wedding, I invite you to ponder the unique gifts of a ceremony that tells your story. Celebrants know that it makes all the difference on your wedding day.

Photograph generously provided by John Mazlish.