Remembering Loved Ones on Your Wedding Day

Yesterday, I had the pleasure of marrying a young New York couple at the Cop Cot Gazebo in Central Park.  Under pandemic requirements, they gathered about 15 family members to witness their personalized vows on a perfect autumn afternoon.  I was touched to see a traditional ring bearer’s pillow with a photograph locket sewn on.  I learned that the photograph was of the bride’s grandfather.

There are so many ways, at a wedding, to honor loved ones who have passed.  They may simply be mentioned in the wedding script or, perhaps listed in a wedding program.  Some individuals wish to light a candle in memory of a family member or friend, maybe including a photograph of the deceased among the wedding day decorations.  For other couples a toast to the departed is in order or a chair left empty at the ceremony is the preferred way to honor a loved one.

While some couples are worried that remembering those who have passed may put a damper on the ceremony, I disagree.  A well-time and appropriately pitched remembrance can enhance a ceremony script with a recognition of the gravity of the day.